Learn Chinese in 5 min

That was the title of an email in my inbox. I was most intrigued because I tried to learn Chinese a few years ago and failed horribly. My Chinese buddies would fall over themselves laughing at my attempts to learn their language and then they'd say it was safer for all concerned if we all spoke in English. Once in a while, when they felt like some amusement, they'd ask me to say, "hello, how are you?" in Chinese, then we'd all revert to English.


Anyway, the email turned out to be a joke. I thought I'd reprint it here as it tickled my funny bone.


Learn Chinese in 5 minutes (You MUST read them aloud)
English - Chinese

That's not right! - SuTing Wong

Are you harbouring a fugitive? - Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me ASAP - Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man - Dum Fuk

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table! - Ai Bang Mai Fu Kin Ni

I think you need a face lift! - Chin Tu Fat

It's very dark in here! - Wai So Dim

I thought you were on a diet! - Wai Yu Mun Ching

This is a tow away zone! - No Pah King

Our meeting is scheduled for next week! - Wai Yu Kum Nao

Staying out of sight - Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

Your body odour is offensive - Yu Stin Ki Pu